Breaking Patterns Personally and Collectively

This shits as real as breaking bones. If you look past the smile and behind the sparkle in the eyes you will see the discomfort that’s furrowing between the brows. Waking up to "WHY – what’s the point?” ⠀

Screen Shot 2019-04-13 at 11.01.26 AM.png

Thoughts preying on my body filling it with excess air taking out the sweet weight of gravity⠀
"take me anywhere but here” ⠀
but that creates a ringing in the ears a wedge in the stomach. ⠀
Old pains come back to visit. ⠀
Hunger sets in - a craving for my feet to feel the earth. ⠀

Grasping for prayers – a Remembering of all that I have: power, purpose, community, divinity ⠀
Here all I have is the taste of defeat. ⠀

So I bow my head humbly to this process that is rocking my bones and body. ⠀
Waves crashing onto rock. ⠀

OH OK death⠀
let me die here again for the MILLIONTH FUCKING TIME bruised and broken so I can wash back onto sandy shores to finally rest and that’s when I realize ⠀

"shit – this is just how it goes for now" ⠀
Our heads so heavy with importance in these times we have to be beaten back into our bodies. To break so we can release the resilience coursing through our marrow - a requisite for restructuring. ⠀

From this vantage point I trade in defeat for sweet surrender. ⠀
I thank the crashing waves and stones for showing up to restore when I can’t. “May your teachings soak into my bones with each cycle so that we begin to surf with each other towards revolution”. ⠀

To evolve “what’s the point?”. The surrender brings perspective. To build a home in my body that the truth of my bones can rest in – the kind our ancestors dreamt of, my unborn children deserve, that my community, partner and spirit can be fed by. Only than can we uncover and become the material, the blueprint of the world we are meant to live in. ⠀

I remember. I don't need to look past the smile anymore. I know it's built on integrity and a story I can trust.